


I'm ok (No, I'm not.)

by agentsofcomedyandchaos



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Quakeshot friendship, canonical character deaths, daisy is not ok, elena notices, implied self harm, ive been working on this for so long lol, post season five
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-23
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:09:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27677189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agentsofcomedyandchaos/pseuds/agentsofcomedyandchaos
Summary: Post season five, before they go to space and before season six. Daisy is not doing well after everything that happened. Elena notices, but Daisy refuses to admit that anything is going on. It isn't until a traumatic event and a surprise reunion to get Daisy to admit what's happening. TW for vaguely implied and referenced self harm, and the canonical deaths of Fitz, Coulson, and Lincoln, along with Daisy's mom.
Relationships: Other Background Relationships - Relationship, Phil Coulson & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Yo Yo Rodriguez & Skye | Daisy Johnson
Comments: 1
Kudos: 46





	I'm ok (No, I'm not.)

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo, I've been working on this for so long, and I'm so happy to finally get it out there. I'm really pressed we didn't get Daisy and Elena making up after fighting in season five, and I find it hard to believe that Daisy was just ok after everything. So, here we are! I didn't feature Daisy's healing process, this is mostly focused on how she feels and how Elena notices, but I can always make a part 2! Hope you all enjoy!  
> -Julia

As soon as they touch down at the lighthouse, Daisy goes to her bunk. 

Everything’s been too much lately. Yo-Yo hates her. May and Coulson are gone, and May isn’t sure if she’s coming back. Fitz is gone. Her and Jemma barely speak nowadays. Mack’s really the only one she has left. But she knows he’s probably going to be busy. 

Daisy lets tears fall, surprised she even has any left. She wishes that everything could be ok again. 

But the chances of that seem bleak. 

-

Elena’s brow furrows when she hears banging from inside the lighthouse. 

She was just getting some water, and the last thing she expected was for anyone to be up at 3:00 in the morning. 

Following the source of the sound, it leads her to the gym, where she sees Daisy. The younger woman is going at it on the punching bag, barely ever stopping. 

“Daisy, what are you doing?” Elena asks tiredly. “Working out.” Daisy replies without turning around. Her voice is raspy, as if she had been crying. “At 3:00 AM?” Elena questions incredulously. Daisy does stop and sits on the bench, sipping some water. Elena moves closer. “Couldn’t sleep. Needed to blow off some steam.” Daisy explains. “Not exactly the best way to cope.” Elena points out. “Not exactly the best at coping.” Daisy fires back. 

Elena sighs. “Daisy, you can come to me. I’m your friend.” 

_ Not the way you used to be _ , Daisy thinks, but doesn’t say it outloud. She’s not ready for that conversation. Not yet. 

“I’m fine, Yo-Yo. Don’t worry about me.” She says, and leaves before Elena can reply. 

Elena watches her leave, an uneasy feeling left in her stomach. 

-

“What happened out there?!” Mack demands. Daisy flinches, but Mack doesn’t see. “I’m sorry, sir. I wasn’t at my best.” Daisy replies. 

Elena thinks that’s the understatement of the century. Her quakes were sloppy, she was overly reckless, and that led to the failure of the mission.

She can tell Mack is upset. 

Jemma speaks up. “Take it easy on her, Mack. We’ll get him next time.” Mack sighs, and rubs a hand over his forehead blearily. “Dismissed.” He mutters grumpily. Mack’s been a bit grumpier and less soft since being promoted to director. 

Daisy flees to her room, and Elena can’t build up the courage to follow her. 

-

Daisy takes her gauntlets and boots off, but doesn’t have the energy to take off her whole suit. 

A dull ache of hunger settles in her stomach as she lays on her bed, but she’d long learned to ignore it until she felt like she was going to pass out, or was fearful that her team would question her.

If they even care still. 

The familiar hole of loneliness she felt throughout most of her childhood settles in her heart again. Daisy usually goes to Coulson and May. But Coulson left, and has barely any time left, May with him for his last days. She wasn’t even sure if she was coming back after Coulson dies. 

Mack is usually her next choice. But he’s been distant, harder. She knows he already has enough going on with being director, and she knows how fast he can lash out at her if he’s busy. She can’t blame him. Making the calls is hard. 

Jemma and her haven’t been the same since Fitz cut her open. And he’s gone too, which is all Jemma can focus on. Finding him and getting him home. So Jemma’s out of the equation too. 

And Elena. God, does she miss her inhuman bestie. They used to be so close. Elena used to be like a big sister...and gives the best hugs next to Mack. If there’s one thing Daisy could use, it’s a hug. 

Daisy’s tired of losing friends, and misses the ones she’s lost her connection with. 

But she doesn’t think those relationships can ever be repaired. 

With that morbid thought, Daisy falls into a restless sleep.

-

Daisy leans back against the bathroom wall, breathing heavily. 

It’s been almost 15 years since her anxiety was bad enough to make her vomit. Someone knocks on the door, and she quickly cleans herself up before opening the door and leaving quickly. 

“Daisy, I was just looking for you.” Yo-Yo says when she sees Daisy in the hall. “Yeah, what’s up?” Daisy asks. “Mack wants to see you. Didn’t say why.” Elena explains. Daisy feels a familiar pit of dread in her stomach. She doesn’t want to talk to Mack. She doesn’t want to talk to any of them. Daisy nods quickly and walks away before Elena can say anything, and she misses the worried look the Columbian throws her way. 

-

“You wanted to see me?” 

Mack looks up from the document in his hand. “Yeah. Please sit.” 

Daisy sits down, crossing her legs together. “I’m sorry I was rough on you the other day. But I wanted to make sure that you’re alright. I know things have been a lot, but you haven’t been yourself on missions. It isn’t like you, the way you’ve been acting.” Mack explains. 

Daisy swallows the sob that’s threatening to fall out of her mouth. She wants to tell him everything, so,  _ so _ badly. How much she misses him and his hugs, how much she misses Elena and Jemma, Coulson, May. But she can’t. Not when he already has enough going on. 

She puts on a fake smile. “I’m fine, Mack. I appreciate your concern but I’ve just been a bit more tired lately. I’ll be fine.” She murmurs. Mack smiles slightly, and dismisses her. 

Daisy walks slowly through the hallway. She hopes that somehow May will appear with a hug, or Coulson with a bright smile. Daisy knows that’s impossible. 

But she wishes it could happen. 

-

Elena can’t help but notice how skinny Daisy looks.

She can almost see her ribcage through Daisy’s thin t-shirt. 

It’s surprising Elena is the only one who’s noticed. Jemma has been cold and heartbroken since Fitz died, and Mack has been distant since becoming director. 

So, maybe it’s not all that surprising. 

“Daisy?” Elena murmurs, placing a hand on her shoulder. She doesn’t miss the way Daisy flinches. Elena retracts her hand instantly. “Have you been eating?” She asks. “Why?” Daisy says defensively. Elena holds her metal hands up in surrender. “You just look skinnier, is all. Daisy, I’m worried about you.” She admits. “You don’t need to. I’m fine.” Daisy deflects. 

Daisy walks away, and it takes everything in Elena’s power not to run after her.

-

The mission was supposed to be simple. 

Everything happened so fast. They were fighting some alien, and everything was fine, then Daisy was suddenly slammed to the ground and being beaten relentlessly. 

Elena’s sprained ankle kept her from doing anything fast enough. Piper, Davis, and Jemma weren’t fast enough either. 

Elena sits next to Daisy’s bed. The younger inhuman has broken ribs, a major concussion, and numerous other fractures. Not to mention that Simmons put her in a medically induced coma. 

“Simmons, is there any reason she isn’t waking up?” Elena asks. Jemma sighs. “No. The way I see it...she’ll wake up when and if she wants to.” Jemma explains. Elena feels tears in her eyes, but pushes them back. Jemma leaves the room, which leaves her alone with Daisy. Elena grips the younger woman’s hand. “Please Daisy. You have to come back. We need you.” She whispers. 

“I need you.” 

-

_ Daisy’s eyes open suddenly. All she can see is white.  _

_ “Good to see you.”  _

_ Daisy shakes her head. That can’t be. “Coulson?” She whispers. Coulson turns around and looks at her with a smile. “Good to see you, sweetheart.” He says. “H-How are you here? Wherever this is?” Daisy asks. He smiles softly. “We’re in Purgatory, Daisy. You’re in a coma.” Coulson explains.  _

_ Daisy can’t believe what she’s hearing. “What happened to me?” She questions. “An alien beat you up. You’ve got a lot of broken bones. But everyone is waiting for you.” He fills in. Daisy chuckles, no humor in her voice. “You and May are gone, Jemma has been cold since Fitz died, Elena hates me and Mack has been too busy being director. Give me one reason why I should wake up.” She snips. Coulson smiles sadly. “What if I told you that Elena is sitting by your side waiting for you to wake up?” _

_ Daisy has a hard time believing that. “Do you really think I should? Wake up?” She asks. “It’s your choice, Daisy. I think you should, though. Everyone would be devastated to see you go. They need you, Daisy. But it’s not a choice that I can make. It’s up to you.” Coulson replies.  _

_ “And If I don’t? Daisy questions. Coulson smiles. “Then I’ll be here. So will Lincoln and your mom. But Daisy, it’s not your time yet.” He says. “But it wasn’t yours either.” Daisy points out. “Daisy, I was already saved from death once. I already had the chance to live again, and I did. I met you, Jemma, Fitz, Bobbi, Elena, Mack, Hunter...and I’ll forever be grateful for that. Daisy, there’s so much you haven’t done.” Coulson explains. “I don’t want to leave you.” Daisy admits tearily.  _

_ Coulson laughs. “I know. But I’ve got my parents and Lincoln to keep me company. He misses you. But he knows that it’s not time for you yet.” Daisy nods. “Tell him I’ll see him eventually. Tell him I love him.” She requests. “I will.” He murmurs. A large bell sounds throughout the area. “It’s time to make your decision, Daisy. If you take my hand, you’ll die and come to heaven. But If you go the other way, you’ll wake up. It’s up to you. But you're fading away fast.” He explains.  _

_ Daisy nods. “I love you, Coulson. So much.” She whispers, her voice breaking. “I know, kiddo. I love you too. Now go. Everyone will be waiting.” Coulson smiles, before turning the opposite direction and vanishing. Daisy takes a deep breath, before walking slowly towards a door. She opens the door, and sees white. Just solid white.  _

_ Then nothing.  _

-

Daisy’s eyes open slowly.

She sees Elena, who is crying with relief. “Oh Daisy, it’s so good to see you.” She whispers. Jemma and Mack are there too, smiles on their faces. “God, that was so New years 2014.” Daisy mumbles, making everyone in the room laugh tearily. “I’m glad you’re ok, tremors. But I do have to go. I promise we’ll have movie night soon, yeah?” Mack murmurs. Daisy nods and he hugs her gently. Jemma places a gentle kiss to Daisy’s forehead and cups her cheek. “I’m so happy you’re ok.” She whispers, before exiting the room. 

Elena decides to stay, and it’s silent for a minute before she speaks up. “Wanna talk to me about what’s going on with you?” She asks gently. Daisy sighs. “I’m just...these past few months have been hard. Coulson...I’ll never see him again. He’s passed on, and May still hasn’t come back yet. I just miss them both so much.” Daisy explains. Elena nods in understanding. “And Jemma...she’s been really distant since Fitz died. Even before that, I had a hard time forgiving her for being so...defensive about Fitz and what he did to me. I mean, he cut me open and really hurt me, and she acted like it was no big deal.” She continues. 

“I am sorry about that. We all should’ve been understanding.” Elena says. Daisy nods with a small smile. “Mack...I just really miss him. He’s been so busy...and I miss having him around.” Elena nods in understanding. “Believe me, I am there with you.” 

Daisy chuckles at that. “And you. God, I don’t even know where to start. You went through something so traumatic and painful, and I wasn’t there for you the way I should’ve been. Then we fought...and I said things. I punched you, I hurt you, and I couldn’t see things your way.” Daisy whispers. 

“You are like a sister to me. I felt like...we lost that after we fought. That we were never going to be the same again. I wish I could take back everything I said, because I thought you hated me.” Her voice breaks. “And I couldn’t live with that.” Daisy whispers. “Oh Daisy. Why didn’t you say anything?” Elena asks. 

“I didn’t know how. I thought you hated me.” Daisy admits. “Mija, I could never hate you. No matter how badly we ever fight, I will never hate you.” Elena whispers. “And I’m sorry for the things I said too.” She continues. 

Elena hugs her gently, being mindful of her injuries. She kisses her head gently. “I’ve missed you.” Daisy mumbles into her shoulder. Elena smiles tearily. “Me too, mija. Me too.” 

For the first time in months, Daisy feels like everything will be ok. 

**Author's Note:**

> As always, kudos and comments are appreciated! Thank you for reading, and If you want a part 2 with Daisy's healing, let me know in the comments!


End file.
